28 June 2009

There's nowt so queer as folk


The feeling when someone who is unwanted knocks on your door is still OK to deal with. You can peek and see who it is and not answer at all. Alternately if you are a lady, you can say you are having a bubble bath and can't open the door. Guys can just open the door in their undies and it should be enough to drive away most mortals (unless you are David Beckham or its someone gay or desperate).

But what if someone knocks on your door 10 times, leaves post-its on it with weird sentences which mean nothing to you. And above all expects a response as though all what they are hounding you about makes perfect sense in the realms of the universe to everyone and it should to you too. If this wasn't frustrating enough, that the person is a mere name to you should really do it.

NOTE: For the purpose of this blog, the usage of the word 'Moron' would imply someone whom I hardly know but who thinks he is my friend and hence can take liberties with me.

So Mr. Moron one fine day has started bothering me in a very slow and steady manner. As a friend on orkut (- a social networking site similar to FB but more popular in India) he was accepted, purely due to me knowing he existed in one of my classes. Slowly pings on Gtalk were the norm with random weird messages overflowing with familiarity. Thoughts of who the hell Mr. Moron thinks he is were omnipresent, every time I read his messages. There are people who can handle it and then there is me. If anyone ever tries to force their presence or familiarity on me, I run miles miles deeper into seclusion.

With such a mindset, I log onto Gtalk one day and pop comes up an offliner. "That caption on orkut, is it because of me?", it read. Just the day before, I had changed my orkut caption to read something like: "Dumb founded by an equation gone wrong, I was never good at Chemistry" and those who would have read the below blog would be able to relate to why I typed in those words. I was hurting and Mr. last standing Moron from the barbaric ages of Homo Erectus thinks I am dedicating my caption on orkut to him! Yes, yes HIM.

But wait, no this is not the reason I am writing this... there's more. He goes on to blabber about how I cleared his doubt by confirming he isn't the reason for the caption. Still further, he says, "I hate breaking hearts and had promised myself that I won't fall in love again! Hence wanted to confirm." I was on the last nerves, none of his sentences made any sense. Finally he says, "Some common friend in UK asked me before meeting up with you, whether it would be alright with me as you are my GF and I clarified saying there is nothing between us. Its good that you have cleared it. Thanks for it."

Firstly he mentioned some common friend as though he and I were a part of 100 social circles. There was only one set with whom I'd have any friends who knew him too and I have met only one of them in UK so far. So who Mr. Common Friend would be was easy to guess but still couldn't relate to what was being said. What was the reason for someone from my Comp Sc. college to think I was Mr. Moron's GF, a guy whom I didn't EVER speak to in college? I couldn't begin to understand how I became his GF. All confusing and with my own anger at this guys guts to relate something very close to my heart with frivolous fleeting of his own, I decided to shut the entire episode off.

I was later narrating this to Nehu (my divine intervention on this planet). At that time too it did not strike me as to what Mr. Moron meant. When I finished, probably the way I said it or Nehu's reaction to it suddenly made me realise what moronic ideas Mr. Moron had been harbouring.

Basically this guy thought I was in love with him ?!!?!?!??!?!??!!?!??!!!!

No really, I found it hard to believe at first. But what he said and did, all indicated to only that. How can anyone even venture to clear a doubt like this with someone as direct as me, I wonder. I never have been able to hide my likes and dislikes where people are concerned. This has been proven beyond a doubt by me getting a 'Resolving conflicts at workplace" improvement area in my annual feedback this year. Funnily, in the end it worked well for Mr. Moron that he didn't know me at all. Or else he wouldn't have attempted what he did, rather he would have been shivering even at the thought of telling me whom I love.

Someone I really look up to just recently mentioned to me a Yorkshire saying, "There's nowt so queer as folk" which was explained as meaning "There is nothing as queer/weird as people in this world". AMEN.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I liked the cartoon on the side... :) Koooooollll!!! ROFL...

Alpana Mandal said...

people like that can be really irritating. u should use the "block" facility on ur messenger. immediately after giving them a piece of ur mind!

Gazy said...

:) Alpana, I can't be that brutal but I am weird enough to write a blog on it and not fear that the guy might stumble on this sometime and hate me forever after!